Gloom, Despair and Agony on Me - 49 days left

Last night was not a good night's sleep.  It needed to be due to all of the my exertion from both CrossFit and Kickboxing.  However, when you have children, it doesn't always go that way.  My five year old awoke from a bad dream about 2 a.m. and was apprehensive about going back to his own bed.  Once he went back to sleep, I was so very exhausted, I didn't have the energy to carry him.  Therefore, I decided I would just go and get in his bed in order to avoid being kicked and bumped for the duration of the evening.

As I awoke this morning, I realized the switching of the beds had been a mistake.  My body was not used to the the mattress and pillows that my son uses and my body had needed better.  To top things off, I was also sick.  I was so very pitiful as I fixed my kids breakfast.  I ate breakfast too thinking it would help the nausea to go away.  Unfortunately, it did not and within an hour I was laying in my bed dizzy trying my best to not throw up at any moment.

Then began the battlefield of the mind.  To go to CrossFit or not to go to CrossFit?  Yes, I physically wasn't up to it.  However, if I didn't go I also knew that I would mentally beat myself up the remainder of the day since this is my "last chance workout" before weigh day tomorrow.  I even thought about going to the class later on this evening.  Yet my concern with that was if I waited, then I would talk myself out of it and never end up going.  I decided the absolute worst thing that could happen was I get sick in class and have to leave.

So I bit the bullet and went.  Definitely not my best workout ever, but a workout.  The workout also contained burpees which I was not thrilled with.  Can I tell you that I still have the scab on my leg from the 50 burpees I did on Saturday? And of course, it would not be CrossFit if the wound did not open back up today as I did them and bleed all over again.  I am beginning to get the feeling that CrossFit is going to be a lot like softball was for me.  I really enjoyed softball.  It was my favorite sport growing up.  However, there was a lot of pain, bruises and scrapes.  So far, I have not had any bruises at CrossFit, but I wonder if that is only a matter of time.

Tomorrow is weigh day.  At this moment, I am just happy that I didn't die today in my workout since I was feeling bad, so I am really not worried about it.  One of my new friends at kickboxing last night suggested that I just stop weighing period and only look in the mirror.  Perhaps she is on to something.  Yet I think it is still a good thing to weigh.  I just need to not let it rule me.  I am still working on that one though.  However, my apprehension about it this week it at its lowest level ever and I plan to keep it that way.

Matthew 6:34 (New American Standard Bible) - “So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself.  Each day has enough trouble of its own.