Karen Being True: No More

Thursday, August 25, 2011

No More - 18 days left

Have you ever had one of those days where you aren't totally submerged in the depths of despair, but you are definitely standing on the shoreline continuously allowing sad, negative thoughts and images to bombard you? That would be the summation of the first 75% of my day. There was no crying or utter depression, but there was a very melancholy sentiment as I wondered through my day merely existing.

Early on, I had decided that there would be no CrossFit workout for me. I would take a break for the day as all of the other sane, rational crossfitters do after three workouts in a row. After all, I still had the upcoming workouts on Friday and Saturday to round out my week and today I really wasn't up to the whole "go exercise" routine.

This all changed for me at about 6:05 p.m., an entire 25 minutes before my class would start. I thought about how miserable I had felt and how slow going I had been all day. And that was the moment I said, "No more!".

I went upstairs as fast as I could. Decided to go ahead and wear the very bright, lime green sweatpants I had on in the name of saving time and cleanliness. I then opened up my husband drawer in search of a t-shirt, as I had not sorted or folded any of the laundry either. And as I looked through my choices, I found my only option was to wear the very worn out, faded softball team t-shirt from when I played last in GA and did such a terrible job due to all of the weight I had gained. What a wonderful boost to my already gloomy day!!!

When I finally go into my minivan to head out, I realized that I would be there just in time if no traffic, road repair issues or slow drivers got in my way. However, they did get in my way. All of them in fact and I ended up walking in 5 minutes late. This, of course, was not before I got a good look at myself in the reflection on the glass door of the gym and realized how very awful my clothing choices really did look. And due to my tardiness, I only made it through the warm up one of three times before it was time to go with the Workout of the Day (WOD).

Then as I read the board, the first sprinkle of happiness for the day begin to find its way into my sad, pitiful mood. You see, the WOD contained dead lifts. Something that I am actually good at and can use a good amount of weight lifting. And instead of feeling whimpy, as I must admit that I do sometimes at CrossFit, I actually felt strong and accomplished before we even started.

Turns out that was all I needed. Just one thing to turn my mood around and put the unpleasant part of my day behind me. My only regret now is that I wish I would have decided to change my direction much earlier on. If I would have aspired to have my "no more" moment sooner, I would have accomplished so much more and would have been so much happier. Hopefully next time, I will remember today and make the decision to do so much faster.