Saturday, May 21, 2011

Raving Fans - 115 days left

On March 5 of this year, it was my 12 year anniversary.  However, instead of being spent at the movie theater watching the latest flick.  Or eating out at a new restaurant we had never been to before.  Or simply dropping all of our kids off at a friends house and coming back home to have a moment of peace and quiet.  I was at the Mall of America alone standing in a VERY long line to try and get a spot on The Biggest Loser Season 12.  And even though I got there well over 2 hours before they started seeing people, I still ended up standing in line for over 6 hours.  As you can imagine after being in line for that amount of time, you kind of get to know the people around you a little bit.  You also hear their conversations.

Behind me in line was a girl who was about 19 years old.  She was there with her mother.  If I had to guess, I would say she weighed about 20 lbs more than I do today.  She was very friendly and had a very nice disposition about her.  Yet the longer I was in line with her, the more my heart went out to her.  Throughout the course of our 6 hour stent in line, the girl and her mother talked about her weight.  Apparently, the girl had already been trying to lose weight and had even been able to purchase a smaller sized skirt that week when she had gone shopping.  However, when she looked for affirmation from her mother with questions like "Can you tell that I have lost some weight?", her mother would answer very coldly and say "No, not that I can see.".  Her mother even went further on to say "Doesn't that store's sizes run a little big?".  Over and over again, the girl tried to have her mother give a glimmer of encouragement.  Even so, the mother would give none.

Unfortunately, most all of us have these people in our lives.  Some, like the girl behind me in line that day, come in the form of a mother.  Sometimes these people are our spouses or very close friends or other family members.  And unlike casual relationships, you want that person to acknowledge what you are doing and care about it.   A couple of the people like that in my life, have shown up this week.  So badly, I just wanted to hear "I am interested in what you doing." or "I know you've got this".  Instead, total disinterest.  Subject was changed and we began talking about something else that concerned them and what they were doing.  It didn't have to be cheers or shouting from the mountain top.  Just a little hit of support would have been fine.  But just like the mother at the Mall of America that day, they would give none.  Honestly, a little hard for me to get over.  I would be lying if I said it was just water off my back.

The other night my dad reminded me of Dory in Finding Nemo singing, "Just keep swimming.  Just keep swimming.  Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming.  What do we do?  We swim."  And so that is what I chose to do today.  Even though this got me down, I still ate right, exercised and drank my water.  And each day, no matter what happens, I will do my best to "Keep Swimming".

2 comments:

  1. I will swim with you, today and the next. I know times we miss hearing the affirmation we want to hear. I would say Imagine all the fun things you will be able to do with our kids and me in the Fall. That dream will bring the encouragement and fire you need to help complete this 118 day goal. Keep conquering the mental challenges. You're off to a great start.

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  2. Thanks babe! I know that I can always count on you!!

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